Where to start? I guess I'll go in the order of the title.
1. Ranting
So I was in Office Max with my dad today, and I was looking for a 2011 planner (my pretty French one has come to an end!). Let me also add that I love planners. I ended up buying a black, "At-a-glance" one made from mostly recycled material, and I plan to decorate it with either white, gold, or silver pens.
Anyway, so the ranting part. There was this girl about my age there, and she was talking to her friend on the phone while looking at notebooks. I started to eavesdrop when I heard her say, "Yeah, my mom was like, 'What happened?' and I was like, 'What do you think happened? I'm hungover.' Then she like got really mad at me and was like, 'Get out of bed and do your homework.' and i couldn't move. like seriously, this one is hurting me so bad. I don't feel good at all...and I still don't feel good! yeah, and at work today i was just dying..."
That was the gist of it. I wanted to go up to her and say, "Something makes me think you didn't consider the consequences that putting a toxic liquid in your body may have." Seriously. Is it just the culture of "oh it's so cool to poison my body and act all weird" that perpetuates substance abuse? When I was at Hannah's on Friday, it was funny for like...10 minutes. And though I'm not trying to judge Hannah, I honestly do not see the point. I've never been drunk, and perhaps I should get myself drunk just so i'm not one-sidedly judging drinkers, but it seems like the dumbest generational fad. You really have nothing better to do than poison your body?
Which is also related to the death of art and music. I'm not saying all of it's dead. But it's not mainstream. Most artists and musicians are drunks or stoners, too, but my point is that for me personally, I know how to experience total bliss without any physical alteration or consumption. No one likes to think or express anymore. I cannot stand when people say, "whoa, that was deep" in a social situation. First of all, it's usually not "deep," and second of all, you're making fun of the fact that it's deep.
AHHHH I HATE MY GENERATION. I try so hard not to judge people who drink or do drugs (excessively), but it's nearly impossible!
2. The show
Today was a couple-hour tech day for the show. Basically I just sat there at the piano (after setting up the instruments), and I played through it after they finished dealing with lighting cues. I just can't wait to have the whole band there. And I also am not a fan of the digital piano. It's the same one (basically) as the one up in my room, and those kinds have NO key traction. I'm seriously considering rubbing talcom powder on my hands beforehand (beforehand...ha ha...) because they sweat so easily. I am going to ask Ms. Smith* tomorrow how she thinks I should arrange the instruments. I am so nervous but so excited. When I was sitting there today, they did a practice blackout, and all I could see was my sheet music (under the little clip-on light), and it all seemed so real. Like the audience was right behind me, like the boys in the band were with me....like it was showtime. It was terrifying and simultaneously beautiful. We are also having to do serious cuts because APPARENTLY it's too long -_-
3. I have butterflies of excitement and overwhelmedness and can't seem to focus on anything. And I need to calm down. Not even calm down in the sense of not be scared...but just stop being so excited! it will make my stomach hurt...i can't crochet, i can't paint, i can't stumble upon! i can only rant and write!
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